May 19 2009 Letter to Son On Jadene

05-19-09 I've fought the urge to fill you in on the jadene thing. Because none of it is anywhere near good news. But my sincerely-felt urge, as a family member and patriarch (on your father's side), is it not some sort of 'duty' to keep keeping those I have a great care about informed? Yes. But why does it seem so necessary to inflict news that doesn't appear to be very complimentary? Back 'n forth my mind boinged until I am so (further) fed up feeling that, in desperation, I guess, I have decided, right or wrongly, to go ahead and try to transmit to you the sense I have been feeling since I hung up on her, twice, on about the 2^nd of May. 'Certifiable' is my current prognosis. I feel that it is important to my own sense of sanity that I must try to ignore this judgment, while at the same time ignoring all further attempts at trying to instill positives into her life. One thing, besides swearing off forever (?) on any further, as I see it and have had to let it slap me in my most special face one time too many, waste-of-time—my precious remaining few years of life—worrying about what th' heck's the key to her unwinding? I am now on such a downhill slope in my life that other people's slides just have to be relegated to non-consequence in what my scheme of things for near future must necessarily stay primarily focused in; and focused positively upon. The less negatives for who and how I would expect to be able to be allowed to live out my golden years, the better. So: In that light, I have, as far as I now know, eliminated all further concern for daughter #4. I know that this may and probably will disturb you, but I am so secure in my sense of having been so righteously-offended that no other option seemed even in the slightest bit agreeable to my peace-hungry spirit. I will not endure the level-of-torture that I now no longer have any doubt about her willingness and intent to try to inflict upon me. No one deserves this (attempted) treatment by anyone, ever, agree? You better, or else. And I think that I've let this out far enough for this advisory notice. I will allow that if you really feel that you must, you are welcome to try broaching the subject, but must warn you that too much invective may become unleashed, so be forewarned and stay steady and composed, calm, cool, collected, sensitive, and sincere; you know . . .